i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
