There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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