Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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