so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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