quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
