is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
