I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
