So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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