Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
