He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
All the doctor said was why
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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