absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I checked into jail on foursquare
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
