please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
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In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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