There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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