You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Randomize
