I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
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they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
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I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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