so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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