My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize