i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
