just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
accomplished twins. life is a go
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
