woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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