I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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