Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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