perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
