is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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