I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
