That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I have already put on my inside pants.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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