I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Randomize
