Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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