I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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