what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
