I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
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the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
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That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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