East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
