I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
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this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
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His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
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