Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
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