I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
