Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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