This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
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