I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
