he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
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