ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize