idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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