it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize