Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
my poor anus
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
