the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
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