I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
