i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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