my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
