She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
