real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
