sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Randomize
